Down to the Halls of the Blind

I can see what you see not.
Visions milky then eyes rot.
When you turn they will be gone
Whispering their hidden song.
Then you see what cannot be:
Shadows move where light should be.
Death is their curse to the sun
To walk the way they had begun.
Out of darkness, out of mind
Cast down to the Halls of the Blind.

I think I mentioned before my utter fear of blindess. Be it physical (I’ve been wearing glasses for a very long time now) or metaphorical, blindess scares the living shit out of me.

I’ve been thinking a lot lately on what drives human life. So far I’ve appreciated three pieces to every human being. A brain, a heart and the ubiqitous dick/pussy (it seems only the first two are ever found to be missing in certain individuals). Each standing in metaphorically for reason, emotion and sexual instinct. Three words that affect anything and everything we feel, want and do. One wants money, social activity and status and various other rational objectives. The next wants friendship, romance, excitement. The last wants sex (and lots of it). For each of these we go out of our daily routine imposed by mother-society to satisfy each need in turn. Needless to say the needs vary in terms of importance, difficulty and degree of satisfaction, but these aren’t the subject of tonight’s writing. They’re also apparently the criteria we judge everything of import to us. A good friend, a profitable venture, a hot piece of ass. They’re like the axes (plural of axis) our whole lives seem to be graphed upon. You could say they are the defining variables to the meaning of life.

So I thought these may apply together on that one thing most of us are in search of at one point or another – the significant other. I thought about it more, and I’m starting to think this might work. I’ve looked at the (relatively few) examples of happy, long-standing relationships I’ve seen through my short life. Every once in a while you meet this one couple that’s been on for years and years, and you look at them and they seem as happy as during the days they’ve met. Not being a person to boast with long relationships, I could not until recently understand how could some people do so well? Now that I’ve thought and thought about it I think I come to understand the immensity of the luck behind such rare poetic miracles. I applied the three words to such examples just as if I was still the geek from grade school that patiently did his stupid homework after school. And just like back then, once I understood the principle, the (math) problems became no more than exercises of applying algorithms. In life all you need is sufficient compatibility on all three axes between two entities (generally a man and a woman, though there seem to be increasing amounts of exceptions) and you get an all-round compatibility that leads to two people basically spending their lives together (in one way or another). Every time you look at someone you look through these three combined eyes. If one of the three is found wanting, it will all fall apart sooner or later.

Consider some examples (not necessarily from my own experience, just… taken from movies ):
-girl sees boy. Boy seems cute. Girl likes. He buys her a drink. They do a little boogie. All is well. They go out privately. Guy turns out to be a shovinistic asshole just looking for some pussy. Heart is found wanting.
-boy sees girl. She’s attractive. He’s attractive to her too. All is well. They start talking. Girl is found to be a stupid blonde. Boy is unsatisfied. Brain is found wanting.
-girls sees boy. They both like each other and have fun together. Everythign goes well and they get to go bump uglies. Except he’s a total newb and has no idea what he’s doing or where to put it. She’s not happy and throws him out. Dick found wanting.

In light of this I’m now wondering how much more fun life would be if we could occasionally blind one of the eyes out, even if only for a little while (so what if she’s as dumb as a door knob? It’d still be an enjoyable night). In my case, being the uptight, stubborn ass that I am, this is proving to be quite difficult though…

Conclusion? Life is random. If you’re really really lucky you get to meet someone and live a story fit for hollywood love stories. If not you have to keep bashign in each eye in turn as needs dictate. Complete chaos (uhm, yeah, that’s a star of chaos I made from pistachio shells when I was really, really bored).